All Because Of Me
by traywonger
Summary: Set in Breaking Dawn, mid-pregnancy. Bella is getting in the bathtub, and as she removes her robe and looks in the mirror, she sees Edward looking in the bathroom mirror, horrified. EPOV. A real scene from Breaking Dawn Part 1. Not really a spoiler.


**UPDATE 3/8/2013: If you've seen some of my other stories, I've been editing my grammar and spelling in some of my older stories, and so I decided to fix this one too.**

**A/N- Just a short little bit of a story. It's a scene from Breaking Dawn Part 1, that they created on their own. Jacob was not there, so we didn't get to see it. This is at a point before Bella starts drinking blood. I hope you guys like it! **

**Summary - Set in Breaking Dawn, mid-pregnancy. Bella is getting in the bathtub, and as she removes her robe and looks in the mirror, she sees Edward looking in the bathroom mirror, horrified. EPOV A real scene from Breaking Dawn Part 1. Not really a spoiler.**

**Disclaimer - Stephenie owns Twilight, and Summit owns the thing that inspired this scene. Darn...I own nothing.**

**Song - Cold by Aqualung & Lucy Schwartz **

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><p>I heard the rush of the water fall from the spigot as Rosalie turned on the water in the bathroom upstairs. She let it warm up for Bella, who was taking a needed bath. She had been through so much lately.<p>

All because of me.

She was carrying that _thing_ of mine inside her, letting it destroy her body. She hadn't been able to keep down food for weeks, thinning her. Her skin had lost all color, only leaving the underlying tone. Not an excuse of the creamy color that I loved was anywhere.

She became weaker and weaker by the hour. The thing broke her bones, making it worse. It was a physical monster.

And I just watched, unable to do anything. She refused to abort the monster that was tearing her apart, from the inside out.

I walked from my room down the hallway, trying to avoid the open bathroom door. But when I saw Bella's exposed flesh, I looked in.

I saw her bare back turned to me, the robe hanging above her behind. Her spine was sticking out of her waxy skin disturbingly. You could see almost every vertebrae straining against her tight skin. Her shoulder blades looked very pronounced, as if they might rip right through the skin. I shuddered at the image. I looked to her arms, seeing how thin they were. I could put my index finger and thumb in a circle position around them and they would touch. Her lower back was so thin - I don't even think she an one ounce of fat left on her. It had all been sucked into her stomach.

I felt my already pained expression deepen. I couldn't bear this. Normally, she was clothed, and I didn't have to see the effects of the pregnancy. But now, only wearing a robe low on her back, she was exposing her bare flesh to me and I could see everything I didn't want to see.

Her skin looked terrible; it was stretched way too tight and it had no color besides the waxy undertone.

She was looking into the mirror at her body. I couldn't see her front side, thankfully unable to see the bruised and battered bulge that was her stomach, holding the monstrosity. _My_ monstrosity. I looked down to her sides. She was still in the process of pulling the robe off. Her arms moved outward, the outline of the bulge, black and purple, slipping through the sides. I wanted to gag. Her body wasn't supposed to look like this. It was unnatural. Inhuman, like the thing she carried.

All because of me.

She looked up in the mirror, seeing me standing in the hallway. In my peripheral vision, I saw my own face in the mirror, my black eyes looking like two giant holes in my face. I could care less about my hunger. I saw my horror-struck face in perfect detail. I hadn't realized it, but my mouth had twisted up into an ugly grimace.

I looked back in her gorgeous chocolate brown eyes, the only thing that had been unaffected throughout the pregnancy. They were so beautiful. You could stare into them for miles, getting lost in their depths but wanting to stay within them.

She met my gaze, and I felt my face crumble. She knew she was dying. And she didn't even care. And she did it right in front of my eyes. All for a monster, like me.

Bella's face looked so different. Her skin was colorless and waxy, her lips were white and very chapped, and her eyes had large bags beneath them.

I stared back, unable to look away. Slowly, she covered herself up with the robe again, never losing my gaze. Her eyes showed sadness. I was relieved when I couldn't see her back anymore.

I didn't even notice when Rosalie shut the door. I stared back, too traumatized to move. But when I did feel the floor hit my shins as I fell to my knees.

She was so beautiful…but all of her beauty was buried beneath her symptoms. I still thought she was beautiful of course…but she was so sick. No matter what she looked like, she would be beautiful. Even if I was disgusted by what I had done to her, she was still Bella.

Why did this thing have to kill her? Why did she have to want it? _Why?_

Making love to Bella had been the best experience of my life, yet I had created this abomination out of it. I shook my head unwillingly.

I was the monster. That thing was just my demon spawn, yet I hated it. Bella should have married somebody better…human. Somebody who wouldn't kill her.

I shuddered violently at the thought of Bella dying. I had felt the pain of thinking I was going to lose her before and I had felt the pain of losing her to the thing was always lurking in Bella's life.

Death.

All because of me.


End file.
